How To Be A Woman, Chapter 5 Review

Chapter 5 opens up with Caitlin telling the truth about women and shopping. Most of us hate it. We do not love shopping and quite frankly I find it fascinating how society thinks that women are supposed to love shopping.

Like all the other chapters Ms Moran starts the chapter with reflecting being age 15 and recapping some sort of teenaged experience that all girls have had at one point in time. This one is about needing new underwear.

How To Be A Woman by Caitlin Moran, photo by me

For the life of me, I don’t know how Caitlin Moran managed to get nearly 14 pages written about underwear alone but by golly she did it and she is my hero just for this fact. I also like that she is pro granny panties too. 🙂

Here, I’ll give you some of Caitlin’s words on the whole skimpy underwear craze:

Women, this manner of underwear cannot be an act of sanity. Why are we starving our bottoms of the resources – like an extra meter of material – to stay comfortable? Why have we succumbed to pantorexia?

It is, of course, all a symptom of women’s continuing demented belief that, at any moment, they might face some snap inspection of their “total hotness.” Women wear small underpants because they think they’re sexy. But in this respect, women have communally lost all reason. Ladies! On how many occasions in the last year have you needed to wear a tiny pair of skimpy undies? In other words, to break it right down, ho wmay times have you suddenly, unexpectedly, had sex in a brightly lit room, with a hard-to-please erotic connoisseur?

Exactly. Bold and Italics emphasis are mine.

Caitlin goes on to affirm that men are most forgiving creatures when it comes to sex. They don’t care what sort of knickers you are wearing. She asks us to think about if the reverse were true, for men, if they felt the pressure to carry around two tickets for a long weekend to Prague in their boxers, lest they suddenly come across a lady who needs a romance RIGHT NOW. No, they most certainly do not.

After her rant on skimpy underwear versus big underwear Caitlin moves on to the bra. No, she is not burning it. She does relay a few humorous stories when it comes to the bra and some flat-out truths about the breasts and the bra as well.

Aw, the relief of taking the the thing off at the end of the day. Thank you Caitlin Moran.

Next week, Chapter 6, I Am Fat!

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