I’m a Totally Bald Woman

I am totally bald woman if you haven’t noticed. And when I go out in public, it seems to me that most people don’t notice either. Sure, some kids may take a second glance but that’s to be expected. It doesn’t bother me, at all.

Being a bald woman has its advantages. And being a bald woman in the south has its own special kind of favor. Being bald in this Alabama hell-heat is a huge benefit.

Think of the money and time I have saved from not having to go to salon or buying haircare products. And no longer do I stress over a bad hair day or if my bald spots were showing.

I wish more women with Alopecia would feel good about shaving their head AND about going out in public.

Thinking back on my own journey, I didn’t really have that much trouble deciding to shave off my hair. It was a timing thing for me. I told myself that once I could not pull my hair back in a pony tail to hide the bald spots anymore, that THEN I would shave it off.

At the time, I was wearing and trying out a lot of wigs too. Back then, I thought I would “have to” wear a wig all the time. And I didn’t want to “have to” wear a wig all the time.

 

Wearing wigs can be time consuming and costly as well. I will have to do a separate post on the pros and cons of wigs later.

So, when I finally had it with my huge bald spots and finding huge clumps of hair all over the bathroom, every day, I told my husband I was ready.

I wanted to go buy some clippers and have him cut it all off for me. What little I had left. But he suggested we go to a professional instead; his barber. And that is exactly what we did.

Immediately after stepping off that barber chair and seeing myself in the mirror – I felt so happy and relieved. I didn’t look half bad! I made my first appearance as a bald woman when we decided to go grab lunch when we left the barbershop. Hell, I didn’t even wear the ball cap that I brought along with me. I felt like myself, relieved, happy, the stress fell away.

When I had to go to work the next day, I had planned to wear a wig. But my daughter saw my pictures I had posted on Facebook and she said, “No, you should go like that, go bald, no wig. You look great.” And so I did just that. I went in bald.

I’ve been going bald ever since. Sure, once in a great while I would wear a wig. But it wasn’t to hide anything, I wore wigs like an accessory, a style statement; like wearing new shoes or something.

I much prefer going bald. I feel way more comfortable and confident with myself than I EVER have in my life.

Sure, some people might come up to me and ask about my lack of hair. Women who assume I have had cancer, going through chemo. Most of them seem physically relieved when I tell them it’s just alopecia. Upon hearing this, they always go on to tell me about their experience with cancer, usually breast cancer. And I always listen with compassion because everyone needs to share their story.

On rare occasion, if someone approaches me about my bald head without assuming I am sick, they always share a compliment. That makes me feel good.

Going through this hair loss, alopecia, c o v i d thing, I joined a lot of Facebook groups for hair loss support and wig groups. You might be shocked to learn there are a LOT of women going through this and it breaks my heart to know that probably 99 percent of them are appalled, dismayed, and anxious over what they might look like without their hair.

When (and why) did we put so much emphasis on our hair?

Again, I wish women going through hair loss could come to terms with it and be okay and go on and rock that bald head! You are beautiful!

More about Carol Marks.