The Venmo Mom – it’s tempting, but are you really that busy?
Wow, I couldn’t believe my eyes reading this article about “Venmo moms” proudly admitting they have no time to help with their kids’ endless to-do lists. Sure, life is hectic, but is the solution really to just throw money at every problem and call it a day?
Are you a PTA mom — or a Venmo mom?
Busy mothers in NYC who know time is money are throwing dollars into the problems that come with intense school party planning and volunteering.
Despite the risk of raised eyebrows and steely judgment from teachers and other parents, they opt to help raise funds rather than spend time laboring at their kids’ schools.
Dikla Goren-Dekel, 43, is raising four kids — 13, 10, 8 and 4 — in New York City and can’t imagine adding PTA meetings and four rounds of class parties to her seemingly never-ending to-do list.
That’s why she proudly calls herself a Venmo mom. – New York Post
Look, I get it. We’re all busy. And I certainly understand needing to Venmo every once in a while. But some of these “Venmo Moms” seem very full of themselves with this self-proclamation.
Between work, family, and just trying to survive the day-to-day chaos, no one has unlimited free time. When I hear parents like Dikla Goren-Dekel saying, “I’ll just Venmo you, tell me how much,” it feels so dismissive. It’s like saying, “I don’t have time to care about this, but here’s some cash so it goes away.” It’s not just about paying for things—it’s about being part of the community that your kid is growing up in.
We’re proud Venmo moms who don’t have time for our kids’ never-ending to-do lists — we don’t care what ‘class parents’ think https://t.co/pS5dn0HE3T pic.twitter.com/jq7FbfjEw8
— New York Post (@nypost) December 31, 2024
School bake sales, field trips, and volunteer days aren’t just annoying tasks on some never-ending to-do list. They’re opportunities to connect with your kids, meet their friends, and show them you value what they’re part of. When you send them off to school knowing you helped organize the fundraiser for those new art supplies or signed up to chaperone that field trip, it sends a message: “I’m invested in you.” That’s not something you can Venmo.
And honestly, this “Venmo mom” mentality worries me for the kids. What are we teaching them? That money solves everything? That showing up doesn’t matter as long as you write the check? Kids learn from what they see, and if they see us shrugging off involvement because we’re “too busy,” they might grow up thinking that’s normal—or worse, that they’re not worth the effort. I mean, hello, your kids ARE part of your life. Make time for them. Maybe these Venmo Moms are making different time outside of school hours with their kids, I don’t know.
One day earlier in December, the Brooklyn mom received an early-morning reminder to dress her preschool daughter in an ugly sweater for the day’s holiday activities.
“Nobody’s even going to talk about the sweater,” Goren-Dekel exclaimed. “It’s just too much.”
The mother of four receives so many messages about her children’s school activities that she created a separate email account for those — and can barely keep up with the WhatsApp notifications. – New York Post
What in the world? She’s acting like setting up a separate email account for her kids’ school messages is some Herculean task. Seriously? What’s next—complaining about pressing “send”? She probably doesn’t do laundry, cook dinner, or clean the house either because, apparently, basic responsibilities are just too much to handle.
It was refreshing to hear Maria Colaco in the same article talking about how she shifted her career to be more present in her kids’ lives. She said, “It’s important for me to get involved because then I get a say in the narrative of my child’s upbringing.” Yes, exactly! You can’t shape your kid’s story if you’re always on the sidelines.
Now, I’m not saying every parent needs to be a Pinterest-level class mom who makes homemade cookies for every event. But there’s a middle ground between overachiever and ghost parent. Even showing up once in a while makes a difference. Whether it’s helping out for an hour at the school carnival or attending PTA meetings to make your voice heard, those moments matter. The way some Venmo moms proudly declare, “I’m too busy to help my kids with school,” is genuinely disheartening.
These Venmo Moms might want to consider getting more involved in their kids’ school activities. Otherwise, they could find themselves completely blindsided by major developments in their child’s life, like little Johnny coming home one day and announcing he wants to be called Jill and start a new chapter. These days, some individuals with extreme activist agendas are slipping into roles as teachers.
The whole “I’m too busy” argument feels like a cop-out. We make time for what’s important, plain and simple. And if our kids’ education and social lives aren’t on that list, we should probably reevaluate.
This trend creates a troubling precedent. If parenting tasks are increasingly outsourced, it begs the question: who takes on the real work? Often, it’s the same parents who end up overwhelmed while others enjoy the benefits. This isn’t a fair or sustainable model.
Parenting isn’t just about providing for your kids financially. It’s about being present, showing up, and being active in their lives. You don’t have to be perfect, but you do have to try. And no amount of Venmo transfers can replace the memories or lessons from just being there.
So, to all the “proud Venmo moms” out there, maybe take a step back and consider the example you’re setting. Sure, sending $20 instead of baking brownies might save you a headache today, but what’s the cost in the long run? You don’t have to bake brownies every week. Learn how to manage your time. You’re the grown-up.
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